Text – Page 137 – Citizen Reporter

On My Island

Weblogging is often a great exercise for my crap memory, so here’s a lil story that must be told:

I must have been about 10 years old when my parents had a teachers’ conference in the Azores, those beautiful islands in the middle of the Atlantic, smack-dab between New York and Lisbon. Naturally being the young son, I tagged along. I had pretty much never been on an island before, not including Manhattan, and certainly not a archipelago of volcanic orgin.

My memories, on the one hand, have gotten pretty fuzzy about that trip. But I definitely remember swimming in hot springs, along with a bunch of other strangers. Later we watched them cook bacalhau (cod) in a volcanic vent… or whatever they’re called in english (furnas). Basically deep holes in the ground filled with boiling water as a result of geothermic something something. They’d cover the holes with lids after lowering the pot in on a rope. Too cool. As if that wasn’t enough, I was baffled by the black sand of the beaches… crazy.

What I remember best of all, was sitting through what would have been boring ass presentations. Everyone was jotting down notes, while I – the token child – sketched fishing boats and sea monsters. They were to be gifts for the twenty something year old teacher from San Jos?, who I had fallen in love with on day 1. She would happily review my drawings and read the clever notes I would write to her, then she’d pat me on the head and give me words of encouragement which made me feel like a million bucks.

That was my thing… draw.. meet girl 20 years older than me… have crush,, draw some more. Ahhh the good old days.

Oh and wouldn’t you know it.. now they’ve got fucking European Blog Awards, they won’t be satisfied til they’ve made the internet a carbon copy of the stupid-ass entertainment industry. Not linking it… cause that would just encourage the fools.

I will, on the other hand, point you to the Torontonienne in the toilet, and the US Federal Budget… flushed down the toilet.

Today’s Sounds: Goin Deep Podcast – inauguration Retardation

Famooose

Man oh man… yesterday was insane. It was as if the entire world woke up, went to work, got bored at work, and found my podcast. First I got a cd from xtx in the mail. Enclosed in the envelope was a Sigfried & Roy hologram, met de vite tigers.

And then – BAM.. the communiqu? got more hits than Michael Jackson yesterday.. set a new personal record. Got a great response from Adam Curry, the godfather of pod, to my site-seeing tour, and as I write this I’m listening to his today podcast and sure enough — IM ON IT! What an ego booster.. I got emails from real life friends I didn’t know were listenin, folks that had never come to the blog before, and best of all, lots of Dutch people who liked my tour. It’s very much validating to hear natives enjoy the reflections of a little ol’ immigrant like myself.

But fear not fair reader… this post isn’t only about me and my shallowness. MAIS NON! I brought a news item that blows my mind and it going to be the talk of the preverbial town in the coming years. THE BUILDING OF A TUNNEL BETWEEN SPAIN AND MOROCCO.

Yes that’s right! Under the sea for you and me. And let me just say.. I’m 100% in favor of it. I think. My policy, in general, is that I hate borders. I’m in favor of having policies that allow people to freely travel between countries. When i have my own country, OPEN BORDERS. And if that makes you nervous, despite your xenophobic tendencies, I’ll look into making you a special play-pen. Cause I wouldn’t want you all upset.

Anyhoot, I’ll be surprised if this ever happens, despite the plan. Too many years of racism and profiteering from illegal immigration via waterways. Then again, I guess we’ll just see more of the same, only via train and car.

If you want to see a great Video-blog or Video-Cast of Amsterdam, check out the Mindcaster’s creation. Tell me he doesn’t hit at least 5 people while riding the streets with his camera in hand. I guess I myself hit 3 people per day and it doesn’t really effect me. -Suckers.

PS – Tomorrow’s podcast features a special guest cinefile who wants to talk movies. — yuck. )

Today’s Sounds: Me First and the Gimme Gimme’s – Take a Break

Oh the bright future

I get brilliant ideas in the shower.. if only I had a pen and paper that would work in those conditions. Yesterday’s podcast generated so much great feedback, even folks who don’t normally read the blog came to hear it. (speakin of which.. if you haven’t heard it, just scroll down) I’m hoping that one of the next shows will be a BOAT-CAST or a CANAL-Cast, as Big Jim has been emailing me, and proposed we round up some cocktails, bundle up, and go out on his boat. So you can imagine what will happen if I just bring my Madonna Mic along, it’ll be like hangin out with operators who are always standing by.

Many of you have now heard me talkin about podcasts, but I worry that you don’t know the tools that are out there for you. See, some of you come to my blog whenever you get the chance and try to keep up with my verbal-abortion marathon. But in fact, if you would just register with bloglines and plug in (where it says add feed) my feed address: http://feeds.feedburner.com/BicyclemarksCommunique , you would then get all my new posts as they come out, and never have to remember to come visit me. Even the new podcasts would show up there. If you love reading news from the BBC or Village Voice, or your favorite livejournal… all of those can be plugged in there as well. It’s called Really Simple Syndication for a reason… and I find myself getting frustrated with people who spend so much time on the internet yet have a sudden mental block when I say the words RSS.

My mom was on the phone with me for our daily Saturday chat… and she starts laughing it up. She says “At work.. I tell people about podcasts and weblogs and they look at me like they have no idea what these words are or why I know these things. You keep me on the cutting edge of technology son.” Right on momma, represent all the moms out there who don’t freak at the first sign of something new.

OH, and don’t miss DC’s hottest new intern and the uncensored photos.

Today’s Sounds: Seu Jorge – Songs off the Life Aquatic Soundtrack (thanks marty mcfly)

Soundseeing Tour of Albert Cuyp Market

Well this one was fun. I loved walking around the market with a earpiece/fast-food mic on my head… I felt like madonna only more bundled up. Follow me as I encounter the sounds, smells and treasures of one of Amsterdam’s coolest markets. Featuring: The Three Euro guy, the chicken stand, the nut shop, the harmonica guy, potato man, brown dog, and of course.. the seafood people. I gotta give credit to Scott and his Tokyo Calling, who totally inspired me to get into this with his “on the way to work in Tokyo” adventure.

Also.. this podcast is accompanied by a flickr photoshow which begins with photo #1.

AudioCommuniqu? #4 (MP3)

64Kbps, 8,000+mb, 18min 50 sec.

Also mentioned in this podcast:

NoCoins

Ipodder.org

McManus

Saturday Contacts

Saturdays are all about very little. Saturday nights are key for jogging through the heart of Amsterdam and taking a euro count. In one 8K run you get to pass posh couples eating 100 euro dinners, prostitutes serving up 50 euro lovin, tourists toting 5 euro maps, and let me not forget the guy who still tried to jog along and sell me X, for I forget how many euros. I guess it’s a typical front when you want to buy your coke, dress in a jogging suit and sweat alot.

Remember when I used to talk about Blondebutbright? There’s a name from the recent past that seemed to disappear from my daily musings. BBB and I went through a low-communicado period, a whole series of misunderstandings, which I know happens to friends sometimes, but has been bothering me for months. If you remember when I used to speak of her, then you know that I adore and admire her. We used to spend so much time talking blogs and life, which eventually led to the birth of her bloggy, which is doing fine btw. And so I finally spoke to her online yesterday, came out and apologized for my radio silence in the last month. We made vague plans to see each other soon, and I’m hoping that soon, everything will be back to normal between us, cause I miss my great friend BBB.

While I’m taking Saturday-Amsterdam-friend inventory, McManus (new blogger alert) took me and his girl to see the AVIATOR. When we first sat down in the theater, he was between us and he exclaims “its like a double date!.” At which time I looked to my right in search of MY date, all I found was a mom and her teenage daughter, gasping at the mint commercial where the guys nipples get all long and hard. (gotta love Europa’s passion for the nipple) OH.. and the movie: bah.. its pretty good. Just be sure and bring a pillow, toothbrush, and full dinner, cause it’s like a million hours long. That and specific attention should be paid to the whole “corrupt congress making deals with corporations” thing, cause times have certainly NOT changed.

NEW PODCAST IS ALMOST READY… stay tuned.

Today’s Sounds: Viva La Podcast, live from New Mexico

Channeling Dick

Before I get to our featured dead guy interview, I wanted to give lots and lots of love/respect/thanks to Kevin mcNoCoins who threw a bit o cash into my paypal tip jar to help pay for my podcasts. Wow. I was so happy… as much as I love podcasts and accepted the cash loss for paying for space, it feels wonderful to have gotten “tipped” by someone who likes the show. Can’t wait til sunday’s podcast.. it’s gonna be a circus.

Without further adue, direct from that whitehouse in the sky, 37th US president, Richard Nixon!

BM: Welcome to Communiqu? Mr. President… or how about just DICK.

D: That’ll be fine son, very glad to be here, what did you call this thing… a blob?

BM: Nevermind that sir, consider it a newspaper. I channeled you from the dead since well, you’re an interesting historical figure and the US has just inaugurated another 2-termer. What do you think about that?

D: So this is some sort of newspaper? Well I never heard of it.. hope it isn’t some commie rag. But right… the second term of MR. W. Bush… I think it’s fantastic, and I wish him all the luck in the world.. cause let me tell you, it’s not an easy job. No sir. Gave me heartburn and an ulcer… I couldn’t even sleep.. it was so nice to finally die all those years later.

BM: Now two-termers are notorious for scandal; Iran-Contra, MonicaL, and well.. your little trouble.

D: Well it didn’t take you long did it, obviously they still like kicking ol dick around. Well fine.. I suppose you’re right, but so long as Bush doesn’t surround himself by ASSHOLES the way I did, he should come out smelling cleaner then when he went it. Agh… if I could just get my hands on that blasted deep-throat.. I’d just keep squeezing. Ehm.. that’s off the record son.

BM: Right, of course, the communique always stays true to whats “of the record.” Hey how is the Nixon library doing? How does it manage financially?

D: Government subsidies and rich friends, son… You think inaugurations are the only things they spend millions on? No sir.. Matter of fact, I just read that Carter spent only 1 dollar per guest at his inaugural gala, what a boyscout. Now Bush, he knows how to make the good times roll and spend in the red.

BM: That’s just about all the time I have for you – DICK… but I did want to ask one more question, how do you think the X-PRESIDENTS will succeed in fighting crime without you? What special power does Clinton bring to the team?

D: I’ll have you know I had nothing to do with that dam cartoon, and I suspect they owe my family royalties. But the clinton one is easy, his JOHNSON. And one final thought, I can’t believe Donald Rumsfeld was in the watergate tapes, and is now Secretary of Defense, while I had to resign and fade away. Bastard.

There you have it.. another worthless interview with a dead historical figure.

*Oh don’t miss when Tony Pierce went black for the inaugeration, excellent reading.

Today’s Sounds: Adam Curry’s Daily Source Code (in Amsterdam)